Things I hate today (and normally hate anyways)

So, another fun filled morning is this bastardy I live in.

It started out mundane enough.. talked to Brendan until he had to go to bed, worked (but for once didn’t get the world’s stupidest questions), stayed up too early because I had things to do.. Then we get into the more exciting stuff. So I called my old high school to see if my brother could take the ASVAB there. That actually went well! The secretary was nice and cute in an old lady secretary kind of way. I can dig it. Then onto my own business. I had to call the Financial Aid Dept because, though the Federal Government takes electronic signatures on taxes, Uconn does not (even with a page stating that no signature is required because it was signed electronically). So, I figured I could call them and get things straightened out. I call at 8:04- already fourth in line… wow. So I hold to their stupid music and mind numbing commentary, then alas, a human! Well Renee was all ready to help me, she was! I tried to explain this mishap as well as I could (yeah I should sleep before doing shit sometimes). Oh but Renee wasn’t having it. Before I could ask if I could email it, she hung up on me. *hangs head in shame* Now, normally I would suck it up and deal with the fact that I have to drive 15 mins to campus, park, walk half way across campus (If you’ve ever been to Uconn you know this is not only epic, but will result in A.Cars coming within literally six inches of you and B.the blue FO trucks running you over on the sidewalk-they seem to dodge you when you work in the office though..woot), get redirected randomly for no reason, have someone fuck something up, walk back across campus, maybe pick up a soda as a treat, hop in my now 1000 degree car, drive home, park in my littler visitor parking space, try to figure out why my roommates only lock the deadbolt (thus resulting in me finagling with the lock and deadbolt lock for around five mins), finally getting inside, kicking off my shoes and dragging my sweaty body to my subterranean lair… but Sunday morning I hurt my right ankle, so driving especially feels like my foot might fall off at the ankle. I figure I value my pained body enough to find some alternative method to getting this stupid paper to these ppl. Ahha! Yes, I could sign it, scan it and fax it online! How clever I am! So, up to the land of the living upstairs, where for moisture reasons still lives up there. I throw the paper in the scan, hit the sweet “scan” button, blink goes the wee light indicating it’s pondering things and……..!!!!…… nothing. Nothing? Nothing. Let me try copying. Hit the copy button (black) and…..!!!…. paper jam!  Took me a good number of minutes and part of the top of my hand to find out it did nothing. Hmm, well perhaps its from the fact that I dl’ed all of the drivers and software from online and only did “basic”. *much dling, searching and insanity ensues* After all that, still nothing. I don’t even see any HP stuff on my comp!? What the heck. At this point its been an hr since my original ordeal with FA (still wouldn’t be home yet if I just went there, but it would have made a dent in the trip), so I figure I will talk to the HP tech support. It’s their job to do this, right? So I try their im service- its down. Okay, I’ll call them. Oh bad idea. Not only is it a bad connection, but its a bad connection with my favorite people, Adam from the Middle East/Southern Asia! Now, I like people from other countries, I like diversity.. hell my room has stolen bits of Asian cultures (my grandfather was stationed variously in Southern Asia and Japan), but two of my biggest pet peeves are: people I can’t fucking understand and outsourcing. I don’t care where the fuck you’re from, I speak English, I’m an asshole, I want you to speak English too if you are going to talk to me (I don’t care how nice you are, I appreciate you trying, but I want to speak with someone I can understand). And outsourcing.. don’t get me gods damn started. I’d boycott all companies that outsource, but I wouldn’t own or use anything anymore. I have friends who were making major money and just got laid off one day because “Adam” will do the same thing for five cents. Outsourcing- death to you. Bring jobs back! Anyways, I carefully enunciated everything I said, spelled out things like my name slowly to make sure “Adam” could understand me. He slurred everything and missed the things I repeated a million times. wtf Anyways, after all this epic time with Adam, he said he had to check my troubleshooting options because the warranty on my printer was up. I figured, no problem, it’s just troubleshooting. Well after Adam being dumb some more, he told me my only option was to pay 40 bucks because the warranty had expired (which he must have repeated at least 20 times) and asked if I wanted to do this. I, of course, said no. Not only was Adam confused, but has to explain to me all of the benefits of doing it (yay, for the next two weeks I can call whenever I want) and asked me again if I wanted to pay up. I said “no”..(see, all around the world “no” doesn’t seem to mean no.. it means a cross between maybe and yes.. epic sadness). He asked me what to do now, like no one has ever said no before… what an odd job to never have someone decline to pay a bunch of money. I need a job like that. So I told him well I guess our conversation is over then and he proceeded to tell me thanks for choosing HP! Yeah, they are lucky I’m not trying to burn down their headquarters (FBI, I’m not a terrorist. I’m too gimp to drive to campus, let alone to wherever HP is… no SWAT team ninjas breaking into my house.. just put me on your “random nutcase” list and tap my cell phone and internet and we will be set, I promise) So, within one min after getting off the phone with “Adam”, I do one google search (instead of trying to get around the hp site) and lo and behold, first link is a gift from the gods. Apparently hp’s are made for macs, so everyone I was reading was mac stuff.. but for Windows, just open paint and it will work flawlessly. Boom, boom, boom- I see it perfectly on my screen, ready to be saved! So I check the faxing site- has to be a doc, docx or pdf, drat. So I copy and paste the jpg into word. For some reason, it wants to save at half its size. What in the Hel (heh, irony.. half size.. half dead chick..)! So I keep trying to redo it- no good. Whatever, they’ll get what they get! So off it went at half size. Merry Fucking Christmas, Financial Aid! I’m too gods damn annoyed to call to make sure they got it. I’ll do it later today or tom. I hate everyone. I need a hug… a non outsourced hug. Outsource my hug and I’ll kill you. (Sorry post-patriot act police.. I’ll be very very saddened, to an emo a pouty level) Yawn, I’m going to sleep.. I hope…


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